I am sorry for my lack of posting lately. The new job is actually taking a lot more time than I thought and it has started to drain my will to write anything for fun. I'm sure I'll get my old spark back before long.
Right now, I am just suffering from several blows to my self esteem. I keep making the same stupid mistakes and I am fighting everything I can to keep pushing forward. I keep replaying in my mind every time I've gotten fired or reprimanded. I don't know if I can go through that again, so I am really sweating over doing a good job and
Life always seems to get crazy this time of year, too. It's the last few weeks of summer around here and the girls are all gearing up to go back to school. Between gathering supplies to fill out their back to school lists, shopping for shoes (oh! the drama!), and attempting to get caught up with laundry, trying to focus on this new work stuff is actually pretty difficult.
The kids are getting stir crazy being cooped up in the hottest summer in decades so the normal activities are not keeping them occupied, and more importantly, quiet. If we hadn't moved to the other size of town a month ago, they would be outside playing and staying out of my hair. This side of town has mostly older neighbors and the only kids around are much younger or have a reputation for being rude and nasty.
I'm sure that getting on a regular schedule will help us all. Little Heart has actually been in band practice for almost a month already and that means getting her to the high school before 7:30 in the morning. As of yet, I haven't gotten up and stayed awake all day yet, but I'm working my way up to it. Of course, going to be at a decent hour would help that, but I'm working my way up to that, too. I hate going to bed at 9:00 at night just so I can get up at 6:00 or 7:00. Not only does it effectively destroy any "alone time" I get with DH, it causes him to have to take care of the bed time duties alone. No one likes that.
Anyway, I have more revisions to work on before I go to bed. Tomorrow is a day of rest and I am going to do my best to actually use it for its purpose.
Deb "The Writer" Lollar